A #poem close to my heart


July 2016
This is one of my most important poems even though it is probably not one of my best. However, I wrote this in my early 20s when I still tried to get to grips with the death of my mother. It also has the to do with identity:

Here is the German original:

Mutter (18.10.1992)

wo bist Du?
Gesucht hab’ ich dich:
in meinen Gedanken
und in meinem Herzen,
in den Bildern
und in den Erzählungen!
Doch Du bist nicht da!

wo bist Du?
Hilflos steh’ ich da,
wenn ich eine Mutter sehe
und ich hab keine
wenn ich ein Kind seh
und ich bin keines mehr
Auch ich bin nicht da!

wo bist Du?
Hilfloses Suchen nach Dir und mir
Lang schon hab’ ich Dich verlor’n
und mit Dir auch mich
Doch mein Grab trägt keine Blumen
in meiner Seele ist es!

wo bist Du?
Werd’ ich Dich je wiederfinden:
in meinen Gedanken
und in meinem Herzen,
in den Bildern
und in den Erzählungen
Damit mein Suchen nach mir ein Ende hat?

Here is my English translation:


Mother where are you?
I searched for you
in my thoughts
and in my heart
in pictures
and in stories!
But you are not here!

Mother where are you?
I stand helpless
if I see a mother
and I do not have one!
When i see a child
and I am not a child anymore!
I am not here either!

Mother where are you?
Helpless search for you and me!
Long ago I lost you
and with you myself!
But my grave does not have flowers!
It is in my soul!

Mother where are you?
Will i ever find you?
In my thoughts
and in my heart
in the pictures
and in the stories
to end the search for myself?


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3 thoughts on “A #poem close to my heart

  1. Your poem is very beautiful Bee and I do feel with you. I believe, that when we leave this world for this time, we will meet the souls, as left before us, if they have any meaning for us. What do you think?

    • I agree. I also think you still have a connection with your loved ones who have passed but its difficult sometimes to be aware of it. Thanks for your kind words.

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